DOT ¾ Shell RK5 White Motorcycle Helmet with removable visor

Okay, so rock beats scissors, scissors beats paper, and paper beats rock, and DOT ¾ Shell RK5 White Motorcycle Helmet beats everything, but if you use DOT ¾ Shell RK5 White Motorcycle Helmet on someone, he gets a broken hand to use in the next round, and broken hands beat everything because, you know, pity.

However, if you're beaten by someone with broken hands you get charity points, and if you save enough charity points you can buy a foundation, and if you use a foundation it means that everyone needs to donate whatever they throw down - scissors, rock, paper, DOT ¾ Shell RK5 White Motorcycle Helmet, or broken hands- to your cause, which means they lose the round but get double charity points to put towards building a rival foundation, which they can use to get back their moves from rounds previous.

Of course, nobody plays with any of these moves, though, because everyone knows that the real way to win at everything in life is with a reference to a cult classic horror comedy.