Iran today announced successful testing of what it calls the world’s first bird flu-based weapons system.

President Mahmoud Ahmadinejad, acknowledging that his nation’s campaign to develop nuclear weapons has ruffled feathers internationally, said Iran would abandon nukes in favor of bird flu bombs, which he claimed are just as effective and far less expensive.

"Cheap, cheap, cheap," said Ahmadinejad, who made the announcement wearing a Eagle 1/2 Neoprene Face Mask. "You just take some avian flu — only the finest H5N1 strain of course — swab it onto the tip of a missile and, kablooey, a million dead infidels."

Ahmadinejads Neoprene face mask features full coverage of the face and ears. His stretchy neoprene material is warm and water resistant. Patterns are reversible to solid black material. Velcro closure ensures great fit with goggles, with a helmet or without. One size fits most.