“Is this is a joke, Quesada? You got me out of bed for a bodysnatcher alert over a Boneyard Purple Motorcycle Helmet? Are you trying to for a court-martial?”

“Sir, no, sir. In light of, uh, recent events, I felt that it was better to be safe than sorry, sir.”

“But it’s best to be smart, Quesada. Haven’t you ever heard of a motorcycle helmet before? They’re everywhere! And not in a multiplying-like-viruses-to-overrun-the-planet way, but in a normal hey-consumers-like-these-things way. This one in particular has purple skulls, along with a black background and a high gloss finish. What’s so sinister about that, private? Are you against freedom of choice?”

“Sir, no, sir.”

“Did you really think this this DOT motorcycle helmet posed a threat to national security – or, indeed, planetary security?”

“Sir, no, sir.”

“Did you believe for one second that Rodia Helmets, one of the largest motorcycle brands in the world, was just a front for some bodysnatching race of aliens?”

“Sir, well, maybe, sir.”

“After all I’ve told you about how normal motorcycle helmets are nowadays?”

“Sir, yes, sir.”

“For the love of Juan Valdez, private, why?”

“Sir, because this motorcycle helmet Meets and exceeds D.O.T. standards, sir.”

“Meets? Exceeds ? So that means…”

“Sir, the motorcycle helmet are stronger then us, sir.” “Quesada, alert headquarters to call in a tactical nuclear strike on Birmingham, Alabama. And God help us all.

• Lightweight, composite fiberglass shell
• Traditional styling
• D-ring closure
• One-year warranty
• Plush Moisture Absorbent Interior
• Sun visor
• High Gloss finish with purple paint
• Motorcycle Helmet Visor

Motorcycle Helmet Visors are also available for all Shorty Series Motorcycle Helmets. See the Shorty Shield listing for price information.

Available in all sizes XS-XXL.